A Mother, My Mother

Also Read: A Sister, my sister

Dear Readers,

Thank you, for all the condolence messages that you all so lovingly sent, on the loss of my mother.

I received an email message, whose author, was not mentioned. 

Am sending you some parts that specially touched my heart.

The message stated that God spent a lot of time making a mother, because she had to have 6 pairs of hands and a kiss that could cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart.

She also had to have 3 pairs of eyes.

One pair in the front of her head, one in the back and one, to see through closed doors.

She had to be made soft, but tough, with the capacity to endure and accomplish tremendous things…

An angel who was overlooking noticed a leak.

God assured him, that it was not a leak but a tear.

A tear to express her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her loneliness, her grief, and her pride."

A mother was made to have strengths that would amaze men. She was made, to carry hardships, carry burdens but she would hold happiness, love and joy. 

She would smile when she would want to scream. She would sing when she would want to cry. 

She would go without new shoes so that her children could have them. Mothers would love unconditionally. 

Women come in all sizes, in all colors and shapes. 

Women do more than give birth. They bring joy and hope. They give compassion and ideals. Women have a lot to say… 

Would you like to hear about my mother, through the following words?

If so, read on!

MY MOTHER, Mrs. LAJWANTI JAMNADAS KHIANI

My mother and I had a very strong Karmic connection. 

I lost my father when I was very young.

My sister, being older to me by 7 years, got married at an early age and stayed overseas.

Until I was a young teen-ager, I lived in Spain.

My outlook and thoughts were totally western.

I could not meet my classmates in discussion when they wondered aloud, how Hindus could be so pagan as to worship cows, monkeys and elephants

After my sister got married, my mother decided that I needed to be introduced to our rich Indian heritage.

Thus, I returned to India, confused.

My mother was deeply religious. She spent most of her time going for Spiritual discourses. She would not leave me alone at home, hence we would strike a deal.

If I went with her for a religious gathering, she would allow me to go somewhere I enjoyed.

At the Spiritual discourses that I was made to attend, my mind would wander to whatever was fancying me at the moment. 

But, somehow, somewhere, sometimes a sentence would find its way into my intellect. Questions within me would surface. Initially the questions overflowed, probably to argue, to prove myself right. But as I came across scholars in front of whom my arguments seemed to have not a chance, I realized the Ocean of Wisdom that Hinduism is.

Mummy’s Ishtdeva was Krishna, but she had deep faith in the Guru Granth Sahib.

I would sing with devotion at Janmashtami and Radhashtami functions, and pay my respects to the Guru. 

So I grew in the company of Krishna and under the benign Grace of the great Gurus.

Thank you mummy, for being the instrument in instilling a spiritual interest in me.

Mummy was extremely independent. She lived alone after my marriage.

Did I say alone? No way! She would spend time, traveling to the abodes of the various Deities, be it, in the lofty Himalayas or in Southern Bharat-Desh.

But did all these prayers and rituals make her superstitious and afraid?

No! Love and Faith in her life were paramount

She always, concentrated and thanked the Lord for the glass half-full, rather than it being half-empty.

Thank you mummy, for giving me the gift, of learning to be grateful, and the capacity to love, despite odds!

She helped me nurse my children through their various childhood illnesses.

My children teasingly called her the night nurse.

Thank you mummy for being a great mom and Big-mama!

The last years of her life, she withdrew into herself.

I was not sure, whether the above, was a spiritual method to reduce her attachments and desires, until a Spiritual Giant, described her condition as Sahaj Samaadhi.

She did not trouble me, in the last 7 years that she stayed with me.

I was troubled however, by watching her go, through the inevitable difficulties of old age. But she bore them with patience.

She told me that I (should not fret as I) had done my best, and she expressed the desire of moving on.

So, Good bye mummy,

Thank you, for being my mother, my friend, my Guide.

Until we meet again, fare you well!

Your daughter,

Vimlu (My maiden name)

Sincerely,

Shakun Narain Kimatrai
27 August 2002

Readers comment:

1) Dear Shakun,

I have visited the site after a long time and just found out about the loss of your mother. I believe she was a great person because her love and devotion shines through you. God rest her soul in peace and may her love forever guide you through.

 Take care 

With caring thoughts...

2) I WAS TOUCHED BY YOUR REQUEST OF YOUR MOTHERS HEALTH. YOU ASK FOR A PRAYER ON HER BEHALF. SINCE SHE IS A DEVOTEE OF KRISHNA,THIS IS MY PRAYER ON HER BEHALF:

 AUM KESHO KLESH NASHAYA,DUKH NASHAYA MADHVAM,

SHREE HARI PAAP NASHAYA, 

GOVINDAYA NAMO NAMAHA. 

MEANING --O LORD IN THE NAME OF KESHO YOU REMOVE ALL AFFLICTIONS, IN THE NAME OF MADHAVA YOU REMOVE ALL SUFFERINGS AND PAINS,IN THE NAME OF HARI YOU REMOVE ALL BAD KARMAS,IN THE NAME OF GOVINDA WE OFFER OUR SALUTATIONS TO YOU.

PLEASE NOTE, I JUST READ YOUR REQUEST. IF IT WAS POSTED A LONG TIME AM SORRY.

RAMSURAT MAHARAJ 

A SISTER MY SISTER

I have only one sibling. An elder sister, who I lost 2 days ago!(7th April 2006)

Did I really lose her?
I have a lifetime of great memories, which will always remain with me!
And I feel a warm glow everytime I think of them!

She was a wonderful human being and had done nothing (in this life) to deserve the amount of physical afflictions that life bestowed on her.
I like to believe that she is free of that cage, we call the body...and is happy and around me, telling me...See, I am free and healthy and beautiful...

The last time I told her daughter to give her a hug from me and to tell her that I love her, she smiled and said to her: " Tell her I love her too and that I will come to India".

I listened to the little voice inside my heart, and It did not let me down!
I managed to go and visit her all the way in Spain when she was at her best, and was able to recognize me and give me all the love that we have shared!